Missing him

My husband went fishing in BC this last weekend. He left thursday and will finally be home tomorrow. I didn't realize how needy I actually am until he left. Man it sure sucks to be the one left at home! I had to work all weekend and have been painting a friend's house, but the nights....so lonely in my bed. If anything though, I appreciate Arnie a little more today, he really is the love of my life! I just couldn't imagine anyone better, he is the best husband I could ever ask for! ( well he was until he left me to go fishing!!)

Part of what makes this adoption process so hard, is seeing my husband wait for his children. As much as I want this, he is right beside me waiting, longing and hoping for his children too. He will be the best dad one day....kids love him and are always drawn to him. When we were running the winter warming at mosaic, he had a bunch of kids who would come in everyday looking for him. I would watch him with the kids, he would get into their world and treat them like they were truly precious to him. I would show up sometimes and the kids would come through the front door screaming, "Where's Arnie??!!". It is so beautiful, but so hard, cause I want our children for him. If it could just be one of us waiting...I would wait, watching him being a dad would be enough for me. But here we are, together, hand in hand, waiting... and it's ok. It's the best to have him beside me, we are closer then most people will get a chance to be because of this. We will be stronger then most people will get to be, and when the time arrives, we will be overflowing with joy...together.

You can come home now!!!!