Sunday, April 21, 2013

Read, Set, Wait...

I know I haven't posted much about adoption/Isaac related topics, I'll try and explain why. The past two weeks I have tried to just enjoy my time in Hungary, to be present and enjoy the company of others. It hasn't been easy and Isaac has been on my mind continually. But when I think about him too much, it just makes the days longer. There isn't anything left I can do to prepare for him, other than pray. His bag is packed, my heart is full, my milk is ready, my mind is set. I feel ready... but it's not go time yet. So I'm taking each day as it comes, enjoying the company, food, sun and the kids. We have two days left, so I've started to let my thoughts gather around Isaac again. I've been flipping through the few pictures i have of him, zooming in on his fingernails, ears, thighs and every little part that is shown in my photos. I've been trying to picture him laying between us, playing, sleeping and eating. I'm ready.
I recently saw a photo on pinterest of a big pregnant belly with an eviction notice sign taped on it. That is how I feel. I've seen many of my friends through their pregnancy and everyone of them has grown incredibly anxious during the last two weeks or so. They are ready. The room is set, the crib is built, the bag is packed, the house is cleaned and they are ready to meet their baby. That is how I feel. I pulled out his suitcase again just to go through everything I have for him. It's all there. I picjed up one more sweater while I was here as Arnie only let me pack one. Honestly, the longer I'm here the more I go over and over all I might need for him. It's ridiculous, I have more things packed for him then I do for myself! It's just time to finally meet him. To see him face to face. To hold him, kiss him, carry him, feed him and love him. That is all for now... it's already too much to think this much about him when I still hae 2 days until we leave and about 5-6 days before we finally see him. One day at a time!


  1. Praying for you as you wait, Bekah!

    Proverbs 13:12 Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
    but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

    (taken slightly out of context, but "hope deferred" and "longing fulfilled" always make me think of this agonizing process (and the desired outcome!))

  2. Oh yes praying and so
    Excited for you!! Love the verse heather wrote. Soon, friend!!